Posted by: dlip | October 4, 2008

On the lighter side – More company?

I have already mentioned the names and characteristics of two companions who insist on accompanying one on this road to recovery. To recount: The first was “depression”, that often times developed into ravines that are deeper and more stark than the Grand Canyon; I understand that this may be an exaggeration although I have been given to understand that Americans tend to exaggerate the size and quality of their possessions, perhaps slightly more than I do, especially if they’re New Yorkers!

Now I don’t know if this is true today, but at one time it may have been. We have a popular old joke here in India that goes like this. The yank and Banta Singh. Old Banta went to the airport to receive the American he was told was a VIP as far as his company was concerned. By the time they were one hour out of the airport Banta Singh was fed up with the American bragging about the size and height of the skyscrapers in “Noo yourk”. When they eventually came by the Qutab Minar the American was completely awestruck by its height. “Gawd almighty” exclaimed the yank, what on earth is that?

Banta replied laconically; “don’t know it wasn’t there yesterday!”

Anyway getting back to the main theme of my narrative, I have two pieces of news for you. One is good news. The other is bad news. The good news is that on this road to recovery from stroke, one has more co-travellers for company. The bad news is their names. One is christened, “frustration” and the other is “anger”. They are both very closely related to each other, one could say they were almost twins or clones from the same parent: “impatience”.

Frustration arises normally from the individual’s inability to communicate clearly or properly which often times results in the other person having to respond with either a “begging your pardon?” , an eh? Or what? Depending on the family backgrounds and schooling that the other has received. All in all this results in one having to repeat oneself many times which becomes very tiring thereby preparing the ground for frustration to enter the picture.

Another reason is that because of one’s numerous inabilities one is forced to ask for help/assistance from others for innumerable favours such as escorting one to the bathroom or to the dining room as also for putting on/off the lights, the fan or TV. Nearly every activity needs assistance which is not always forthcoming. One calls and the other does not answer – another cause for frustration.

One has dealt all of one’s worthy life with people of average or average plus intelligence. Welcome to the world where thanks to my inability to communicate clearly, the rest of the world appears to have come from Mars. Or if I were the alien from Mars on a reconnaisance mission to earth – with my limited powers of communication – I would go back to Mars and report the complete absence of intelligent life on planet Earth.

It is amazing and I compliment myself on not having had another seizure, just by trying to deal with people in general, people who find it hard to second-guess me and those whom I have to try and second-guess. Please don’t ask me for examples. Repeating and reminding myself of the many incidents of such stupidity exhibited would force me to commit hara-kiri!



  1. Yes, Americans do exaggerate. And most Americans that have experienced stroke have the same friends as you. It’s not nice at all and what is even not nicer is the people who do not respond to a stroke victim’s calls. I can only imagine what it is like to sit in a bed or lie on the bed and not be able to do what you want to do without help. The caregivers who don’t respond immediately should be treated the way you are treated.

    Dalip, I am going to send your blog’s address to the stroke society in America. I think it is part of the american heart association. I will let you know, but they need to be aware of you and introduce people to your blog….

    Dalip, don’t let anyone be rude with you–Hold your ground and if it is mostly the help, tell your wife to speak to them in front of you. It may not be them and then you can certainly do this on a one to one basis!!! Take care dear man–Frank

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